I Will Not Give Up...2015 version
Well, Happy Monday Lovelies,
One of the great things about being off Social Media is that I am going through all my old bits and pieces of writing and musings. I went to the bottom of my notes today and dug out the missive posted below and it seems timely.
Because in the near past, I was giving up. So noisy and wildfire was my inner dialogue, with SNS as the petrol being thrown on the flame, that I just gave up. I sat down with my husband and I said “I feel like I’m giving up”. And I cried over lunch with a friend and said “I just give up”. And I sat with myself and declared “I give up”.
And I did. I just let myself be and I gave up. I gave up using social media as a way to pass the time (and it turns out that I am filling the time with activity like this, which is far better).
I gave up endlessly updating myself with other people’s activity - although I am always interested in people’s news and updates. (And am in much closer in-real-life and other contact with my close friends.)
I gave up the using social media to talk about my business - and used it to communicate and had a strategy for posting in a different kind of way. This has a life of its own. Still sitting with it; working it out.
I gave up going to networking events and handing out as many business cards as possible (I haven’t done this for years) but just spoke when I wanted to speak and attracted the people I wanted to talk to. Which it turns out is young women who are seeking mentorship. Watch this space for the iteration of this - it’ll be sexier and fun.
Essentially, the giving up becomes a letting go. And letting go of many expectations and external influence allows just being. To be. And then we get into the activity that allows us to iterate. And once we are at our authentic core, we can just be and the ether opens up and things start to assemble in alternative ways.
So please enjoy this retro-post - it’s a little bit like teenaged poetry, and it’s also genuine and sincere. I’m happy to be embarrassed.
December 2015
I will not give up.
I don't even know what that looks like.
Seriously I really don't.
I don't know what giving up would look like
Or what the alternatives are.
But I will not give up.
Subside.
I will endure the bit where I question myself.
And question myself.
But I will not give up.
I'll keep doing the work.
Knowing the work is foundation.
Paving.
It's not always going to feel creative.
Or joyful.
Or fun.
Or inspiring.
Or elating.
Or even interesting.
Sometimes it is just putting one foot in front of the other.
Laying one flag after another.
Heavy lifting.
Repetitive.
Humble.
Hard.
Work.
But it goes somewhere.
I'm not waiting for the big sudden enlightenment where I suddenly get to be all the things I'm not.
On time; punctual.
A whizz at Excel.
Detail-oriented.
Focused and steady.
No.
I have to be doing these gentle humble works daily.
Not giving up.
And the enlightened moments come from that.
There may be periods of extreme protections.
When your heart is a shell.
You don't even know why but you know your body knows.
Nature.
Seas.
Trees.
All allow the body to download what the mind stubbornly retains.
I am on a complete social media break until the end of July. Keep in touch though through email, Whatsapp and Line. Also sign up for Sarah Furuya Coaching communications here.